


Under haunted skies

by CherryBlossomLesbian



Series: Prompt Fills [23]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Crying, Gen, Nightmares, Panic Attacks, Past Torture, Prompt Fill, Tumblr Ask Box Fic, past electroshock, set within TFAWS
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-07
Updated: 2021-03-07
Packaged: 2021-03-13 02:01:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,932
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29893953
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CherryBlossomLesbian/pseuds/CherryBlossomLesbian
Summary: The biggest problem for Bucky is that it's highly likely that he's been to every HYDRA base or outpost in Germany or Russia during his Winter Soldier era. He was afraid of it either digging up bad memories, or bringing all new memories to light.Neither option was ideal.OR: A mission brings back memories, which leads to nightmares, which lead to panic attacks. Sam helps.
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes & Sam Wilson
Series: Prompt Fills [23]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1978546
Kudos: 24





	Under haunted skies

**Author's Note:**

> Prompt: Can I have a prompt set in fatws where a mission they went on brings back some bad memories for bucky. And then later on sam wakes him up from a nightmare and it’s so bad he starts having a panic attack. Then sams VA stuff comes in and they work it out. Thanks! I rlly enjoy ur fics
> 
> I've recently gotten a lot of requests/prompts, so I think for now this prompt fill series will only be updated with fics filling prompts requested to me on my [Tumblr](https://cartersleia.tumblr.com) ask box or my [Curious Cat](https://curiouscat.qa/CherryBlossomLesbian). If there's suddenly a long period where this series isn't updated, that's probably why. I'd still like to do a Thorbruce fic, a Rhodeytony fic, or a PLATONIC Bucky & Shuri fic in this series, so I'm open to prompts of those too! 
> 
> Title from Turning Tables by Adele 
> 
> Warnings: Past torture/electroshock, nightmares, panic attacks.

"Bucky, you don't have to come-" 

"I'm fine." He insists, looking back at Sam as he secured a pistol to his holster. 

There's another mission. The address of a warehouse in western Germany that's been widely suspected of being a HYDRA outpost for decades came up in a paper trail on a hunt for a missing person. An FBI Agent asked SHIELD, Sharon specifically, for help on investigating the location, and now here they are, in a plane that's circling around a thousand miles above the warehouse. 

The biggest problem for Bucky is that it's highly likely that he's been to every HYDRA base or outpost in Germany or Russia during his Winter Soldier era. He was afraid of it either digging up bad memories, or bringing all new memories to light. 

Neither option was ideal. 

"Agent Woo said our missing person sent multiple packages to this location, so any deliveries we find in the base should take priority over anything else." Sharon informed as she finished typing her hair into a tight braid. "This is a good opportunity to canvas the whole warehouse, but our main purpose for coming here is for the missing person's case." 

"Agent Woo...why have I heard that name before?" Sam asked as he began testing his wings before they left. 

"Because you've been hanging out with Scott too much. Next question." Sharon put a few guns in her own waist holster, and then held a covered knife and glared in Bucky's direction. "Stop putting your weapons in my storage compartments, Barnes." 

"Could be worse. I could've put my lunch in there." Bucky shrugged as he joined Sam on the other side of the plane where the hatch would unlock and slide open whenever they called that they were ready. 

Sharon just sighed and threw the knife back in her storage, before joining the two of them. 

"I've got the parachute, I'll land at the east side of the base. You still good to fly Barnes and yourself to the west side?" Sharon asked as a final check. 

"Yeah, I've got him." Sam said, turning to Bucky with a smirk. 

Bucky huffed as the door slid open, and Sam's arms wrapped around him to secure him during flight. 

Sharon kept true to her word, steering off to the east side, while Sam flew to land exactly on the west side. 

They landed okay. Bucky made some quip at Sam for a rough landing, and Sam just answered by saying he could've dropped Bucky at any time. 

They milled throughout the warehouse as best they could. It was a winding path, definitely not suitable for an actual warehouse, which meant it was definitely being used for an alternate purpose, whether by HYDRA or another organization. 

Most of the rooms seemed to be designated for storage, with shelves filled with plastic tubs lining every wall. 

That is, until they reached a large, circular room in the center of the maze they called a warehouse. 

There was a shallow dip in the concrete floor at the center of the room, with cable outlets installed next to it. The only objects in the room were two large, mechanical appliances where the ground evened out from the dip. 

They were machines Bucky recognized not-so-fondly. 

Ignoring Sam's suggestion to stay away from it, Bucky just continued forward, inching towards the machines until he was close enough to see the layer of dust that had collected on the surfaces of both of them.

One was a vitals machine. Monitored heart rate, blood oxygen level, and blood pressure when the wires were hooked up to an accompanying device. The other controlled voltage and energy into the same device. 

That device, that was meant to sit in the dip in the floor, was The Chair. 

His vision grew blurry around the edges as he gently laid his flesh fingers down on the vitals machine, watching the dust get transferred onto the pads of his fingers. 

"Buck-" Sam called from behind him. 

Bucky just gave the machine a light kick, and the previously blank screen glitched to life. It was difficult to decipher the reading that was eternally stuck on the machine's display due to the poor quality and sudden and rapid flashing, but Bucky could make out enough. 

198 BPM. 141/90 mmHg. 86% SaO2. 

Extremely accelerated heart rate. High blood pressure. Dangerously low blood oxygen saturation. 

Every time they shocked him, they pushed him to the verge of death and then brought him right back to do it all over again.

He took a deep breath, once, twice, and a third time, before he turned away from the machines and back towards Sam. 

"Alright. Let's keep going." 

~~~~~~~~~

In the end, they made out of the base with a few unopened packages and discarded shipping labels with no fuss. 

There were no agents. No soldiers. Not even a janitor. Bucky's pretty sure he heard a mouse squeak at one point, but that's the only sign of life any of them found. 

After debrief, Sharon went to go deliver their findings with the FBI, leaving Sam and Bucky to retreat to the solace of their apartment on the outskirts of DC. 

They went through their usual post mission routines. They went to their separate rooms to change out of their suits and shower, and then Sam ordered food, and they hung out in the living room and watched whatever primetime TV was on while eating. 

Then, around ten pm, after hanging out for a bit, they parted ways to their respective bedrooms and went to sleep. 

Or, at least, tried to go to sleep. 

Tonight it wasn't coming for Bucky, which isn't that shocking. He's had his fair share of sleepless nights and boughs of insomnia, it's nothing he hasn't experienced before. 

He just felt...too alone. Like somebody could burst through the window and take him right back to HYDRA and The Chair. Which was stupid, Sam was right across the hall. If anything happened, a single scream would alert his roommate and he'd be there in a minute. 

Still, it couldn't hurt if he was closer. 

He gathered his pillow and blankets and went out into the living room, making himself a little nest on the couch. It wasn't the first time he or Sam had fallen asleep on the couch when they had trouble sleeping, and it wouldn't be the last. 

He found the remote and clicked the TV on, keeping the volume low as he put on a channel about animals. They were currently talking about dolphins. It was nice background noise to urge him asleep. 

He was out like a light after listening to the narrator of the dolphin documentary for three minutes. 

~~~~~~~~~

"Higher." 

He bit down on the mouthguard as more electricity flowed through every inch of his body. 

"Higher." 

"Sir, his muscles are contracting-" 

"I said higher." 

He screamed loud enough to hear it ringing through his entire skull, along with the bolts of lightning being sent straight to his brain. 

"Shut it off." 

His breath was knocked out of his lungs as the pain finally came to an abrupt stop. 

The agent who had been commanding the tech came to stand in front of him, kneeling so he could be at eye-level with him while he was stuck in The Chair. 

The agent removed the mouthguard, and asked, "What is your name?" 

He blinked, his brain turning up nothing when he searched for a name for himself. 

"I...don't know." He replied, voice hoarse from screaming. 

The agent smiled. "Good. You're close to where we want you. Your name is not important." 

At that, the agent held the mouthguard back up to his lips and he opened on instinct, which once again made the agent smile as he put it back in his mouth. 

"Do it again." 

The electricity began again, and the current ran through his body again. 

He screamed out in agony, but there was nobody there to listen. The only thing he can hear is buzzing and the order to turn the machine up. 

He screamed, and screamed, and screamed- 

"Bucky!" 

He gasped out a harsh breath as his mouth was free again and his vision faded back into reality. 

He looked up to find Sam's face, twisted in worry and concern. Sam's hands were on his shoulders, as if he had been trying to shake him awake. 

Bucky blinked, causing a few tears to spill out of the corners of his eyes, as he landed fully back into the present. 

There was a heavy weight pressing on his head, and then there were quick, short shocks flaring up in his limbs, even metal. 

Tactic hallucination. He was okay. They weren't here. He wasn't in The Chair.

The shocks start to last longer and longer and all the tears that had been waiting to be formed finally came out. 

He began to sob, his entire body shaking without his input. He feels lifeless and numb, and before he knew it he was collapsing forward, completely limp. 

Sam caught him before he hit the ground, embracing him gently as Bucky sobbed into the fabric of Sam's plaid pajama top.

"It's okay. You're okay." Sam said a light tone, holding Bucky close and letting him cry. 

It took five minutes for Bucky's tears to die down and for the shaking to halt. Sam held him through the entire thing, and towards the end he began a slow, rocking motion in an extra soothing attempt. 

"...sorry." Bucky apologized as he pulled away from Sam's shoulder, cringing at the large stain of tear-soaked fabric. 

"It's okay." Sam promised as Bucky wiped his nose on his own sleeve. "Sorry for waking you up, but you were screaming and thrashing. I didn't want you to hurt yourself." 

"No, thanks for doing it." Bucky wanted to wince at the sound of his own voice. The hoarseness from screaming felt like sandpaper to his eardrums. 

"Here, we got some popsicles in the freezer. They might help your throat." Sam got up from the couch to head into the kitchen. Bucky grabbed the tissue box from the coffee table to wipe his tears properly and not just on his or Sam's shirt. 

"We got grape and strawberry." Sam said as he returned, two unwrapped popsicles in hand. 

Bucky took the grape one out of Sam's hand, which was an answer enough. 

The animal channel was still on, even in the midst of everything. They had moved on from dolphins to penguins. 

They ate their popsicles and watched the penguins slip and slide on the ice until the sun began to rise on the horizon. 

At five am, only an hour after Bucky's abrupt awakening, Sam had to go and get ready for a six'o'clock meeting at the base. Bucky wasn't usually needed at the base except for debriefs and mission information, but Sam had a lot of meetings as part of his Captain America duties. 

And Bucky was more than happy that today was a day he didn't have to go anywhere. The popsicle helped, but his throat still ached and his voice wasn't the best. 

Bucky remade his little nest on the couch and settled back down as Sam poured himself a cup of coffee before he headed out. 

"Alright, Buck, I gotta head out. You good?" Sam checked in as he threw his jacket on. 

"Mhm." He murmured, before turning his head ever so slightly to look Sam straight in the eye. "And thanks. For helping me." 

Sam smiled. 

"Of course. Anytime."

**Author's Note:**

> If you'd like to submit a prompt for me to write, check out the notes of my prompt fills series this fic is in!
> 
> [Twitter](https://twitter.com/cartersleia)
> 
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